“To Be a Black Man in America: The Weight We Carry, The Truth We Live”

By Charles Zackary King
Founder/CEO of America in Black and White and AMIBW The Magazine

Introduction

To be a Black man in America is to live with a dual reality: one shaped by brilliance, resilience, and legacy, and another shaped by suspicion, exclusion, and systemic violence. It’s not just difficult. It’s deliberate. And yet, we continue to rise.

This post is not a cry for pity. It’s a declaration of truth.

The Burden of Being Seen

• Criminalized Before We Speak:
  From childhood, we’re labeled “aggressive,” “disruptive,” or “dangerous.” Our tone is policed. Our presence is questioned. Our humanity is often denied.
• Economic Gatekeeping:
  We are told to “work twice as hard,” but the doors still close. Black men face higher unemployment, lower wages, and fewer opportunities, regardless of education or experience.
• Policing and Surveillance:
  We are over-policed, over-incarcerated, and under-protected. The justice system was not built to serve us, it was built to control us.
• Emotional Suppression:
  Vulnerability is seen as weakness. We are expected to be silent, stoic, and strong, even when we’re breaking.

This is the example of being Black. Being Black is what happens when you are always stopped for no reason and then being asked “why are you up set”? “You must be guilty of something”, when you are just coming from work or going home from visiting family. The thing that makes this even worse is that you have other Black People including family that don’t believe you because the brain washing of the media has made them think you are guilty. There is nothing worse than having your Mother, Father, Brother, Sister, Wife/Girlfriend thinking you are guilty and refusing to support you because they can not give you the benefit of the doubt. None of these people can see the stress they are causing you but they want you to protect them and do what they need from you. Our own people can not see the harm they cause you. This adds to all kinds of pain and trauma and they still don’t see that.

When we talk about the Economic Gatekeeping we are talking about ever since the 70s when the PayScale represented the White Man, the White Woman, the Black Woman and then the Black Man. This causes your woman to look down on you and the others to think they can use you for pennies on the dollar and get the milk for free. Being put in this position is a major problem for your household but your wife/girlfriend does not see it that way. When you do what is necessary to please her, she complains but when you are not bringing in enough money she complains. Communication is bad and needs to improve because the wrong people have influenced your way of thinking and your love. What is still not seen is this man is struggling and is feeling trapped. This is the thing that has led to Single Parent Households.

The justice system has a precursor that states if you are a Black Man you must be guilty, and we can plant evidence against you and not worry about it. No one cares for you, and people will back the Blue when it comes to you. The bad part about this is some of the officers look just like you. Again, something that is adding to more stress than you can handle and it causes anxiety and mental health disorders. The question that is always there, “will they be here for me when I need them”? Please think about this.

As a Black Man we have pride and refuse to let anyone see us vulnerable. We cannot be weak, and we refuse to let others know we are hurting. The problem with this is Black Men have been carrying this jug of water for more than 100 years. We are not appreciated but are looked upon to protect and serve, we are not respected but expected to solve the most complex problems, and we are the real professionals with so much knowledge but never get the acknowledgement we deserve.  All along we are the real strong leaders, thinkers and can do men on the earth that make a real difference.

The Truth They Don’t Teach

• Black men are more likely to die prematurely due to systemic neglect in healthcare, housing, and mental health.
• We are less likely to receive fair trials, adequate representation, or restorative justice.
• Our stories are often told by others, flattened, filtered, and stripped of nuance.

Our health always come into play because we have to be involved in the things that happen to our communities, our families and our people in general. Our leadership is needed to work with the others in our communities instead of against them. In todays time it is all about leadership and we have lots of it. We will continue to provide this until the day we die.

We know we will never get a fair shake which is the thing that makes community and family so important to us. It is clear and evident what the justice system has in store for us but what do we do? This is why we have to make sure we build our communities and keep our families together because when there is no male figure in the household outsiders find ways to take advantage of our people.

This is being told from my eyes because it is important that we do what is necessary to work and build together. Outside ramble is just that but we got to continue to show that we are the real leaders of our people. We have to communicate better but met with the same demeanor from those in our community. No on or nothing is perfect and I know we can grow like everything was intended to be for us all.

This is not accidental. It’s structural.

The Legacy We Build Anyway

Despite it all, we lead. We mentor. We create. We heal. We build platforms like America in Black and White and AMIBW The Magazine to tell our stories on our terms.

We are not just survivors, we are architects of truth.

Personal Reflection

As a Black man, I’ve felt the sting of betrayal, the weight of expectation, and the silence of being misunderstood. I’ve been told to “tone it down,” “wait my turn,” and “be grateful.” But I’ve also seen the power of truth-telling, the healing in storytelling, and the strength in community.

I write this not just for myself, but for every Black man who’s been told he’s too loud, too angry, too ambitious, too Black.

Do what is necessary by your wife/Husband and Family and make sure you are documenting and telling your story. Don’t ever give up just keep pushing because as a Black Man you are really viewed as the KING you really are.

Call to Action

• Listen to Black men. Not just when we’re in pain—but when we’re building.
• Support Black-led platforms. Subscribe, share, and invest.
• Challenge stereotypes. In your workplace, your media, your conversations.
• Honor our humanity. Not just our struggle—but our joy, our creativity, our legacy.

Citations

• Brookings: The Challenges Facing Black Men
• Black America Web: Common Problems Faced by African Americans